Fan Fiction: A Jealous Rage! Chapter Forty Six




My Precious Baby Boy!

Chapter Forty Six

“Don’t bother, I’m not coming home” Five months ago a raging bull faced his warrior woman in a battle field of love right outside her parent’s house. He was livid with her that she dared to switch of her phone, not bothering to tell him where she was. She had defied him even further when she said to him “don’t bother, I’m not coming home” this drove him red hot to boiling point, racing like a madman in his powerful black BMW to haul her pretty little ass back to their home, back to their green room, back to where she belonged.  When he got to her he said with finality, get into the fucking car right now.  She stood like the warrior woman that she was, ready to spear him in this battlefield of A Jealous Rage!

Her father was watching them from a window, wearing his rose tinted glasses unaware of a full on lover’s war taking place right in that moment. To shield her father from her reality, she got into the car as commanded by her raging bull going back to Kapoor Mansion under silent duress.  We shivered in dread of fear but secretly wanted to know with our one eye opened, what would happen when raging bull and warrior woman locked to battle in the privacy of their green room. When they reached Kapoor Mansion a 360 degree turn took place when our rock star Dadi got tired of waiting for her great grandchild from these two so she took matters into her own hands formulating her own agenda  pretending to be at death’s door so that there was utmost urgency for her most desired wish to come true.   

That night the pain of seeing their much loved Dadi in that weakened state was a shock to their systems so their anger turned into compassion for each other as warrior woman became a lover’s heroine and raging bull became a lover’s hero. They set their green room on heat that was not anywhere close to a battlefield of A Jealous Rage! This became a lover’s paradise ordained by destiny for a night time of intense loving.   On their oversized bed of haven, he came to her worshiping her body, running his hands and tongue from her head to her toe licking every last inch of her silky skin.  Feeling her readiness he gently slipped his rock hard length into the slickness of his woman, the woman whom he owned body and soul.  He slid in and out of her, mouth to mouth they locked, and chest to breast they pressed crushed in their mating of love.  They reached peaking in their climax at exactly the same time exploding their lover’s juices into each other. This time when his rich seed met with her fertile egg a beautiful creation took form and baby Kapoor was blessed in life. 

Five months later on this day emotions were far too many that baby did not understand what was going on. All that he knew, his mama was in great danger and she was all alone.  Where did papa go too?  For the first time he kicked his mama today to let her know that he was here, because he was frightened.  Even when mama and papa fight and papa shouts at her he never gets frightened because papa was his hero and he always made his mama feel better, but this time he was really scared and mama told him don’t be frightened my baby and that they would be with papa soon. Something bad happened to mama, he heard his papa’s voice but they were doing something to his mama that was jerking him inside, he was so scared he tried to stay safe but there was  too much of movement he couldn't hide so he got caught in the umbilical cord attaching him to his mama. Sadly baby Kapoor did not survive the trauma and his short life ended before it even began.  He knew with all of his heart that his mama loved him so much and he loved both his mama and papa with all of his little being. Maybe one day he could come back to be with them but for now he had to go back.

There are moments in a man’s life when he is urged into a direction that sometimes seem totally out of zync with who he is, and the what, why, when, where becomes irrelevant, for right now in front of him is the answer that he always seemed to miss.   Ram’s conversation with the Priest was an enlightening experience at a point when he needed it the most; calm reigned over him giving him the courage to go back to the Seven Hill’s hospital and the strength to face his responsibility. There was no improvement in his wife’s condition and right now he had a need to meet with his son. Dr Mehta had promised, when he was ready she would take him to his baby and so here he was alone in a private room waiting for that moment while his mind refused to think.  The door opened, he looked up to see Dr Mehta carrying a tiny bundle wrapped in a white blanket. He stood looking at her unsure of himself with a quickened beat to his heart. There was compassion for him as a slight smile crossed her face, she said Mr Kapoor here is your son and she put the tiny bundle into his outstretched arms. I’ll leave you alone, press the bell when you ready and I’ll be here. She touched his arm gently and said I’m right here Mr Kapoor. He nodded his head, no words dared to come out, she turned and walked out of the room gently closing the door. 

This private room had cared for many and right now it was witness to a father meeting his dead baby for the first time, not daring to look Ram went across to the wingback arm chair and sat down, with the baby placed in the crook of his arm. He closed his eyes for a few seconds or was it a few minutes. Opening his eyes his hand moved to gently lift the soft blanket that hid his son’s face, he finally saw his boy for the first time, his dead son.  At five months he was a developed baby with a thin layer of skin over his skeletal body.

Ram held his tiny little hand and brought it to his lips, tears welled up in his eyes as they flowed for his little boy, he sang a lullaby for his son softly while his heart broke. 

 

Hush, little baby, don't say a word,
Papa's gonna buy you a mockingbird.
And if that mockingbird won't sing,
Papa's gonna buy you a

He choked up, he couldn’t complete the rhyme because he knew he’d never have the chance to buy anything for his son with all his money right now, holding his dead baby in his arms he couldn’t buy him anything.  He sobbed holding his bundle close to his heart I’m so sorry my son, I’m so sorry that papa failed to protect you and your mama.  Please forgive me my son, please forgive your papa.  He rubbed his cheek against his son, I love you baby boy, I love you my son.

A little while later after he’d calmed down he said to his baby, you will always have a special place in our hearts and we love you very much. Mama is not here right now but I know how much she loves you too and it’s going to break her heart that you not here with us.  I hope wherever you are, you will be there for her and tell her to please come back to papa because papa loves her very much.  Ram closed his eyes again for a few stilled minutes and when he opened them a serene calmness washed over him and he said beta I will call you Kush, you are Kush Kapoor he hugged this tiny little body to him pressing the bell. Dr Mehta walked in, are you ok Mr Kapoor? he nodded his head taking a deep breath.  Mr Kapoor if you ready to let go of your son the hospital will take care of the rest.  He looked at her and said if you referring to the final rites of my son, no doctor Kush Kapoor will have the proper final rights befitting him, I will perform his final rites. The doctor looked at him with understanding and said Mr Kapoor if that’s what you want we wilI respect your decision. He handed his baby to the doctor and she walked out the room back to the cold room, back to where Kush Kapoor would lay until his papa performed his final rites.

Ram went out to where the rest of the family was, it was indeed a long day and a long night, when they saw him his siblings rushed to him and held him for comfort and he clung onto them without tears just being a brave strong man he spoke firmly with dignity, tomorrow morning I will perform the final rites for my son.  Shipra gave a shocked sob and went to him holding her palms together a broken mother  that she was, she pleaded please Ram, please beta don’t do this, please don’t do this while my Priya is lying in there. Ram looked at her with compassion and said if I don’t do this the hospital will get rid of my baby and I can’t allow that to happen. My Kush will have dignity in his death and I will give him what is owed to him, it’s my final decision and he walked off leaving everyone looking at him in silence.



 

Om trayambakam yajaamahe sugandhim pushtivardhanam
Urvaarukamiva bandhanaan mrityor muksheeya maamritaat.

 

In the early hours of Saturday morning at the crack of dawn the final rites for Kush Kapoor was taking place, the men were gathered at the crematorium all dressed in white as they watched with much sadness Ram light the pyre for his son.  While at Kapoor Mansion a satsang was held, the woman were also dressed in white seated on the floor as they faced the altar singing devotional songs.  At the foot of the altar was a beautiful wreath of white flowers with just a hint of blue highlights and a little teddy bear placed on it, the most heart wrenching sight to see was the babies name Kush Kapoor. Their hearts were heavy, the tears didn’t stop as they prayed for the soul of little Kush Kapoor to rest in peace. They prayed for god to be with Priya to keep her safe and that she recover's soon.   Dadi was indeed grief stricken, she couldn’t believe the tragedy that they were facing so much so she cried to her dead husband how could you let this happen you were suppose to protect our family how could you let this happen to our Golu puttar, I can’t bear to see him suffer like this, I can’t bear it she cried in pain.  When the family broke the news to Dadi, Dr Shah their personal physician was right there to ensure her well being, she was at an age that was left to taking no chances so extra care was warranted for her.

 Sometimes we do underestimate our strength to handle grief we don’t even realize how god gives us the strength to face the burdens and challenges we have too.  Even in the most trying of times god is there with us and right now the Kapoor and Sharma family needed that assurance  and re-assurance more than anything else in the world. The beautiful sun rose over the ocean and standing at the shores edge was a proud father who stood within the shallow waters lapping over his feet as he immersed his baby boy’s ashes into the sea , Kush Kapoor be happy my son, be happy as he watched the gentle waters carrying back the ashes further into the deep ocean.  Ram felt at peace within himself, he knew his baby was up there looking upon them and he would surely be there for his mama.  Not looking back he went home to have a cleansing bath, washing off the burning smell on him; once he was refreshed and dressed, his private helicopter was on the grounds of Kapoor Mansion, the pilot ready and waiting to take him to the hospital.  There was tight security around every Kapoor member, the Seven Hills Hospital was fully secured with armed security both from the Mumbai police department and that of Ram's personal body guards as he went to sit and wait for the news of his wife. What more could this Saturday bring in their lives and bring into our lives?   

He was sitting in a private VIP area designated for the Kapoor family. Mr Kapoor, he heard his name being called out and looked up to a find a nurse watching him. Mr Kapoor doctor said that you can go in to be with your wife. He was taken aback, what are you saying, he asked worriedly did something happen to my wife? No Mr Kapoor she quickly said, nothing happened to your wife she’s still in the same condition, doctor thought you might want to spend some time sitting in with your wife,  yes , yes he said I want that, he rubbed his eye and said please take me to her.   At the entrance of the private room in ICU, bodyguards were stationed on either side of the closed door, they greeted Ram as he walked inside the  room closing the door, shutting everything out. 

The last time he saw Priya she was being shocked for her life in the emergency room, he watched her helpless body move like a rag doll of the bed now here he was, seeing his Priya lying still on the bed with tubes attached to a life support machine, an oxygen mask placed over her mouth and nose helping her to breathe.  He stood still watching her from a distant his feet not daring to move forward as he remembered every shade of her beautiful smile from her famous grin to her famous pout, a pout that she had reserved solely for him. He couldn't help a little chuckle, in all of the pain he went through flash black moments has her smiles changed like the weather.

 

 

 

Ram your babies are starving.

Ram you need a haircut

Ram you promised to buy me Kulfi

Ram I’m not talking to you

Ram I need you

Ram are you crazy

Ram I love you

Ram, Ram, Ram the way she spoke his name be it when she was angry at him, or when she was scolding him, or when she was in his arms loving him. She had so much love for him that to not ever hear his name on her lips ever again would be the end of him.  He tried to be strong and tough, but watching the soul of his life lying here left him bereft and alone. He knew he couldn’t live without her, without her love, without his love for her so standing here right before her he vowed to himself, if anything happened to you baby, I will die with you that’s my promise. I warned you your life is mine, its mine to keep and that’s how it’s always going to be in this birth and in every other birth I’ll never let you go baby, never.  I will follow you till the ends of the world to be with you, you can’t leave me even if you tried I’ll be there right behind you.

Finally he moved forward taking a chair close to her bedside, he sat down holding her hand in his as he dropped a kiss on her perfectly manicured hand.  With his hand he gently caressed her palm sliding his fingers through hers bringing it back to his mouth  he slid his lips along her ring finger, which was bare without her wedding ring on it.  Late last night the night sister on duty handed him all of his babies jewelry, she could not wear any of her adornment’s while she was her.  He remembered only just recently when he’d taken out his wedding ring forgetting to put it back on she ripped him into pieces, he off course was equally crazy if she missed wearing any of her marriage symbols but right now seeing her bare of everything that was a symbol of their marriage hurt him so much.

I love you Priya, I love you my angel please come back to me, please baby he begged.  He dropped his head against her hand closing his eyes to feel the warmth of her hand.  He felt a jerk against his cheek, quickly he looked up to see her eyes fluttering to open.  Waking up from his seat he leaned over her with eagerness he said that’s it sweetheart he urged her, come on baby open your eyes for me, open your eyes for your Ram and like he commanded she opened her eyes. He choked back a sob, o my love, o my baby I love you so much.  She tried to move her head to her side wanting to say something.  He lifted the oxygen mask away slightly from her face so that he could hear her.  She tried to give a slight smile but she was too drained to move, my baby she whispered, we had our baby I want to see my baby she mumbled under her breath but she was too drowsy to keep her eyes open so she drifted off to sleep.

 Ram’s heartbeat stopped for a second, how would he dare to tell her that their baby had died, how would she handle it?  All that he had was hope for now, the mere fact that she opened her eyes and responded meant that she was going to be ok, thank you god, thank you so much. Just then Dr Mehta walked into the room, Mr Kapoor she said, he turned looking at the doctor with a smile on his face, doctor you won’t believe what just happened, my Priya opened her eyes, she opened her eyes doctor, she opened them for me.  Dr Mehta quickly moved forward to the bed taking her pen light to her patient, she opened her eyelids flashing the light into her rolled eyeballs, she then continued to check all of her vital signs and said well Mr Kapoor I think all our prayers are going to be answered, it looks like our Priya is coming around.

Ram was a relieved man, a relieved husband but he looked at the doctor with concern, doctor I’m just worried about one thing, when she opened her eyes the first thing she asked was to see our baby, she thinks she’s had the baby. What am I going to do doctor when she finds out the truth.  Dr Mehta looked at Ram and said I'm not going to lie to you the fact is, its going to be very difficult for her to come to terms with loosing her baby and I don’t think we should hide the truth from her for too long maybe just until she’s able to get her strength back and once she is able to comprehend what happened to her then we would have to break the news to her as gentle as possible.  It’s going to be tough Mr Kapoor and your reaction is going to matter the most. What do you mean doctor, what do you mean by that? We’ll you’ve got to be there for her no matter what happens, you have to be the strong one and help her deal with this trauma. I know you yourself have been through so much already but it’s going to take a whole lot from you Mr Kapoor to make Priya feel good about herself, to make her feel that even though the baby died she is more important to you.  You see she is going to see herself through your eyes and I know that with your love and support you can both overcome this together.  Doctor without a doubt whatever you've just said is exactly what matters to me, Priya is my life she means the world to me so I understand exactly what you mean.  I’m ready to deal with anything, I just want my wife well and back home again, and she will be Mr Kapoor trust me, she will be.

With my life, I will protect our baby with my life!

God Bless!