Fan Fiction: A Jealous Rage! Chapter Forty Seven

 

 

Chapter Forty Seven

 

 

 

 In the eyes of my mother!

 

 

 

A country with an identity that goes back to the beginning of time India is a nation filled with emotional people who are out- pouring with their ideals and are re-active when their way of life is threatened.  Inside the vastness of this charismatic country live courageous people who honor and worship their motherland, but sadly amongst this mega populous of a billion people a criminal infestation rips into a core of a society that was once deeply rooted in human values and ethics.  It has left its doors widely opened exposing a vulnerable self, and allowing negative ways of world to filter its ugly head into a land that was once spiritually uplifted. This was a land with noble thoughts word and deed, a land that had respect for life. Here we are today moving ahead into a modernization that was meant to have leaped ten- folds in progression instead we are bearing witness to a generation crumpling at the seams in violent savage acts of crime.

 

While devious greed takes us under siege, selfish motivation unleashes a power struggle within us that's defect from our moral obligation. Our blasé uncaring attitude lay helpless at the helms of a pathetic screwed up syndrome. We have allowed criminal activity to slip into our very societies; we’ve sat back mute watching from within our circles the masterminds of terror reign with hateful degradation, raping our land of its values, that would have our very own gods crying at the mutiny. Mother India the same children whom you have nurtured with so much love, the very children that you had so much hope for, failed your love.  They have lost their ideals to a heinous way of life leaving you in such despair. Can’t they see your pain; can’t they understand your love? Come back children of India come back to your mother India she is dying without your love.  Rise India rise; rise for love of your motherland, meet her sublime of expectations. Raise your standards so that no one dare point a finger at you, make our mother India proud so that we can turn within western ideals in dignified grace and say I’m truly Indian for I humbly bow before my motherland worshipping her with all that I am carrying the blessings of my Mother India always.  As I lift to glory the trio-colors of my India in saffaron, white, and green while proudly in the middle the navy blue wheel of the Ashoka Chakra reminding us our law of Dharma, our law of righteousness. Rise India Rise, rise for love of our Mother India our motherland for eternal life.

 

 

Jana-gana-mana-adhinayaka, jaya he
Bharata-bhagya-vidhata
Punjab-Sindhu-Gujarata-Maratha-Dravida-Utkala-Banga
Vindhya-Himachala-Yamuna-GangaUjwala-Jaladhi-taranga
Tava shubha name jage Tava shubha ashish maage
Gaye tava jaya-gatha
Jana-gana-mangala-dayaka jaya he
Bharata-bhagya-vidhata
Jaya he, jaya he, jaya he,Jaya jaya jaya, jaya he !

 

 

The biggest representation of India to the world lies at the hands of Bollywood, bringing the real yet not so reel to life giving us moments in celluloid of captivating drama with all the glitz and glamour, with twists and turns, with comedy and action, with truth and sorrow, with love and romance. Whatever it is it does seem larger than life, this razzmatazz of Indian cinema and Indian television enthralling us daily with entertainment making us crazy dreaming of the statuette beauties that pass through, the dashing heartthrobs that we yearn to touch if only for just a moment to cherish and when there’s a crisis in our country, or when we are facing a tragedy, what do we?  We look to the stars of Bollywood for comfort and support and true to form the stars were out in full force rallying around to show their outrage at Friday’s hostage, a tragedy that should never have happened. Through the world of twitter and face book they took to these social networking sites pouring their support in tweets expressing their shock and sadness at the hostage drama and like with all trends, trending in India 

 

#PriyaKapoor

#RamKapoor

#StMarksCollege,

#LieutenantColonelRohitSingh

 

 

Twitter had cyber world firing away at their finger tips.  In a full on media coverage from its news broadcasters to the news paper editions there was compassion and sadness yet in the cut throat world of expose questions and answers were a public demand. The who, what, why, when, became the central talking point sparking debates that the government once again failed to protect, there was call for the minister to resign.  How could Priya Kapoor not be without security was she negligent in not having her security with her? How did this student enter the college armed with explosives and not being detected?  Are our learning institutions becoming a crime spot for unsavory activity?   How would Priya Kapoor be compensated for the trauma and loss she suffered? Amongst all of these questions coming proudly into the forefront was our hero from the Indian army Lieutenant Colonel Rohit Singh who was praised for his fine bravery.

 

 No doubt the Indian media would leave no stone unturned until every bit of this story was revealed to the public so over the next few weeks we where sure to expect a public scrutiny watching for the law to take its full course within its judiciary power.   Should partial sentencing be given or should we be calling for a life sentence. Then there was one faction of the public that felt this story was now being overly sensationalized because of the Kapoor name. Come on we’ve had worse crisis that don’t even get the publicity that it deserves so why the uproar now?  Did prominence and wealth deem what and who’s important or not, I mean it is sad but what about our other unsung heroes and heroine’s that were sacrificial lambs in hostage’s cases.  These innocent people were sole breadwinners living normal lives, most times living within the squalor of poverty. What happened to the forgotten and not so forgotten heroes once again questions and answers.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Whatever said and done, right now the Gateway of India the monumental pride of Mumbai was a gathering point and the venue to a candle light vigil for Priya Kapoor fighting for her life. It touched the nation even more when they came to know this young pregnant mother lost her baby in such tragic circumstances. From the echelons of Mumbai society, to Bollywood stars, to just ordinary people they all came out to a meeting point to pray and grieve. Tonight candles flickered with hope giving a ray of light in these darkened sad times, for a candle was said to transcend all religions being a universal symbol reaching out in love and compassion.   When Ram’s head of Public Relations came to him earlier in the day and told him about the candle light vigil he said, sir I know this is a very difficult time for you but there is so much support from the public that they holding a candle light vigil for Mrs Kapoor tonight and I think it would be a very good idea if we can release a short written statement from you that can be read out at the vigil.  Natasha came to her brother holding his arm she said, bhai that’s a really good idea we will go and represent you and show our love and support from the family.  Ram looked at his choti holding her around the shoulder when did you grow up, he asked her. Resting her head on his shoulder she said I love you bhai, I love you so much. He hugged her, I know choti, I know I love you too.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

At 1900 hours standing on a raised platform amongst some of the familiar bollywood faces of John Abrahams, Vidya Balan, Tushaar Kapoor stood Natasha, Apeksha, Rishabh and Karthik looking on at the thousands and thousands of people that came here to show their support.  It touched their hearts seeing all of these strangers holding a candle for Priya they were choked with emotion but stood with dignity and pride for their Ram and Priya their most loved and cherished siblings. Natasha was given the honor of the family, stepping forward to the microphone she took a deep breath saying a silent prayer within herself she began to speak. Good evening to all of you, to all you wonderful people who have come out here in support of my family thank you. My name is Natasha Kapoor and I have a message to bring to you from my brother Ram Kapoor.  With a slight trembling hand she opened the letter that Ram wrote earlier,  Apeksha stepped forward and took hold of her sister’s hand has they joined together in unified support giving her the strength and the courage to go on and speak.

 

Once again she took a deep breath to calm her nerves and began to read, “ To the people of Mumbai and all over India from the bottom of my heart I thank you for your amazing support and love you have shown towards my wife. With your constant prayers I know that she will be on the road to recovery soon. My entire family and I are deeply touched by your compassion and kindness.  Thank you once again, may god bless you all”.

 

 

There was a huge round of applause that seemed to echo miles into the city, people were touched that in such sad times Ram Kapoor had a message for them and it made the vigil extra special.  The memory of seeing him coming out of the air ambulance a shaken blood stained man following behind his deeply wounded wife would be etched in their minds for a long time while the crescent moon loomed in between those darkened skies, slightly formed dew brought in freshness into the outside air and tiny specks of water found its own space forming droplets around as the burning lights of the candles brought in a glow of warmth into a city in grief.   The candles lit up for miles and miles brining hope, giving love and showing it’s all time support in compassion.

 

A distance away in the city inside the dimly lit private ICU room Ram sat in a single arm chair to the corner of the room. His head rested back against the softness of the fabric his eyes closed while sleep overtook him. His mind restless while cold shivers ran through his body as the breeze of the air-conditioning blew onto his skin keeping him chilled.  In a vague distance he heard his name being called Mr Kapoor, Mr Kapoor the voice continued to call out. He felt a hand touch his arm shaking him Mr Kapoor wake up, Mr Kapoor please wake up your wife is dead, Mr Kapoor wake up your wife is dead. Ram jerked his body both his hands gripped onto either side of armrest while his fingers dug into the covering. His eyes quickly opened, the darkness turning into dimness the transition blinding him for a split second, he focused into an empty room with his wife lying on the bed. He woke up in a speed going to her he could see the rise and fall of her chest, her normal regular breathing keeping her alive. He touched her forehead, a sigh of relief washed over him feeling the warmth of her body running into his finger tips, she was alive, she was alive.  He walked to the window as he stood leaning his head against the closed glass looking out into the skies his thoughts were frozen the coolness of the glass touching the skin on his forehead while a lone tear drop splashed on his hand. 

 

 

Hum tere bin ab reh nahin sakte
Tere bina kyaa vajood meraa
I can't live without you now,
What's my existence without you..

Tujh se judaa gar ho jaayenge
To khud se hi ho jaayenge judaa
If I get separated from you,
I'll be separated from my own self..

Kyonki tum hi ho
Ab tum hi ho
Zindagi, ab tum hi ho
Chain bhi, meraa dard bhi
Meri aashiqui ab tum hi ho

Because you alone are,
Now you only are,
life. You're my life.
My peace, and my pain,
you alone are my love..

Teraa meraa rishtaa hai kaisaa
Ik pal door gawaaraa nahi
Tere liye har roz hain jeete
Tujh ko diyaa meraa waqt sabhi
Koi lamhaa meraa naa ho tere binaa
Har saans pe naam teraa
How's this relationship of ours,
I don't like distance of even a moment
Every day, I live for you
All my time is for you..
There shouldn't be a moment of mine without you,
There is your name on every breath.. 

Kyunki tum hi ho
Ab tum hi ho
Zindagi ab tum hi ho
Chain bhi, meraa dard bhi
Meri aashiqui ab tum hi ho

 

 

Tonight has prayers went out for his wife's well being, he sat next to her bed holding her hand in his.  Earlier in the day when the doctors were assured that she was breathing on her own they took her off the ventilating machine he was confident that she will be fine.  His mind was here but not really here for he re-winded back in thought to when Priya was in hospital after she collapsed from the stress of her father having a heart attack.  Through all of the pain they had received the most amazing news of their lives, Priya was pregnant they were pregnant.  Today here he was once again sitting right by her side having cremated their unborn baby early this morning, while his wife lay asleep clueless to the harsh reality of their world. God only knew what would happen when she woke up but whatever it is he knew how much he loved her and he vowed to get her through this ordeal.

 

 

 In his deepening thought Ram didn’t notice Priya had opened her eyes, she was silently observing him. She thought of how much she loved him, he was everything to her.  She smiled he seemed to be a bit careless these days he didn’t shave, his hair was still in need of a cut.  What am I going to do with you Mr Kapoor?  She felt her throat being parched, finding a bit of strength to talk she called his name softly, Ram, there was no response from him, she called again this time she moved her hand in his this alerted him, he looked up to see Priya smiling at him.  He smiled right back at her with so much love he said, hello my sleeping beauty.  He ran his hand lightly over her hair finally you up.  I’m thirsty she said, he quickly poured some water into a glass and helped her up so that she could drink the water. Once her thirst was quenched he laid her back down on the pillow, I missed you sweetheart.  She smiled, really she asked, yes really he said.

 

 

She continued to stare at him why did you not shave? Running his hand on his chin I think I forgot. Hmmm and why have you not had your haircut yet? He laughed and here we go with your nagging.  She asked him, so you think I’m a nagging wife, she ran her fingers around his roughened stubble.  He laughed catching hold of her hand bringing it to his lips maybe just a cute nagging wife whom I love very much.  With a slight grin she said well it seems I’m not doing a good job because you never listen to me.  Awhh baby how can you say that he grinned flashing his billion dollar smile, I always listen to you.

 

While her smile focused on him her thought was processing something else, Ram I want to see our baby?  He shut his billion dollar smile knowing this question would be minutes away. It was not going away here it was, hitting him really hard.  With enough conviction he said, not yet baby first you need to get your strength back and secondly it’s too late now.  Surprisingly she didn’t persist but asked him, did we have our son or our daughter, we had our son he said. She grinned really we have our son? Yes we do, who does he look like she wanted to know?  His heart was breaking a bit of both of us she smiled that's nice so what are we going to call him? Without hesitation Ram said Kush.  Priya went quiet Kush she rolled the name on her tongue absorbing it in her head, letting the pronunciation of the name Kush sink in.  Kush Kapoor she said under her breath, Kush our son, finally she smiled I like the name, I like it very much.  He laughed well off course you like the name because I chose it.  You know Mr Kapoor you are so full of yourself, you always get your own way. Why Mrs Kapoor is that a bad thing he asked her? She shook her head no sometimes it’s not a bad thing at all, they looked lovingly into each other’s eyes absorbing the moment to its fullness.       

 

Moving her eyes away from him she looked around the room and in the dimness of the light she saw bouquets of flowers in various colors, shapes and sizes. She turned to him are these all from you, she asked? He shook his head I wish they were all only from me, i’m jealous of those flowers. You jealous she asked, why? Bringing her hand to his mouth I’m jealous that they not all from me.  She laughed then who are they from?  A lot of people, you mean I know so much of people.  He laughed at her shocked expression, baby you’d be surprised how much of people know you.  In fact there’s so much more of them the rest of the flowers are at home and at my office.  She  smiled so Ram it seems you have some competition, and I don’t like it he said endearingly, I don’t like it at all he moved his finger gently over her lips. Ram please hold me she said softly, baby what if I hurt you, she shook her head, trying to move slightly to give him some space. He sat on the bed taking her in his arms, her head resting against his chest.  There a quickening beat in his heart, it felt like heaven having her like this, holding her he dropped a kiss on her eyebrow.

 

 

 

 

 

 

A gentle tear slipped through the corner of her eye he felt the wetness.  Why you crying love, he slid his finger along her cheek catching her tears. She rubbed her cheek further into him, I love you she said, I love you so much.  He squeezed her tight careful not to hurt her she was so delicate that he had to treat her like fine china. I love you more he said, and she said no I love you more. No Mrs Kapoor I love you more.  Are you going to argue with me, she asked sniffling her nose.  He laughed no I’m going to love you even more he kissed her forehead. There was only silence and deep felt love while the clock ticked away they both drifted off to sleep. Ram hadn’t slept since he woke up in her arms on Friday morning and now with her back in his arms he closed his eyes has sleep took hold of him. Sometime later he could hear his name being called, a hand on his arm gently shaking him. He opened his eyes to quickly check on Priya she was still fast asleep curled up against him.  He looked to find the night sister standing next to him, sir I think it’s time for you to leave.

 

No he said, I can't go, I can't leave my wife like this she needs me.  Sir I understand but you also need to have a good night’s sleep.   Sister I don’t care about me my wife needs me more right now.   Look sir she’s asleep now and we will not leave her side, we will check on her constantly so please go home, get a few hours of sleep so that you can be fresh and clear headed when you see your wife again.   Ram glanced at his watch the same watch that Priya had bought him in Delhi at the Cartier store.  It was now 2am maybe the nurse was right maybe he needed to go home, he might as well get his haircut and shave before he sees her again, at least that would bring a smile back on her face.  With his mind made up he said, ok sister I’m leaving but don’t leave my wife’s side. Don’t worry sir she will be fine, he gently moved his body away Priya stirred clinging onto him he stilled shhhhhhh sleep my love, sleep he kissed her lips softly, I love you baby. He laid her head down gently on the pillow waiting for a few more minutes to ensure that she didn’t wake up.  He turned to the nurse and said would it be ok if I brought some of my wife’s personal things, I know she’d be a lot more comfortable wearing her own clothing.  The nurse smiled at him yes Mr Kapoor that would be fine.  Thanks sister he turned to leave exiting the room while in the passage the bodyguards were on alert, good night sir.

 

 

At midmorning Ram walked into the ICU room to a brilliant sight finding his wife awake sitting up on the bed lying against the pillows, so many emotions passed through him seeing her awake with a smile on her face was like a beautiful dream, she looked at him with so much love, good morning baby he said coming into the room sitting on the edge of the bed he dropped a kiss on her lips.  She held the sides of his face sliding her nose against his cheek en-haling his macho smell and loving it, hmmmmm you had a shave I love how smooth and soft your skin feels when I touch you, and you had your hair cut too. Smiling at him she gently bit into her lower lip Mr Kapoor why are you so handsome?  He laughed so you think I’m handsome, nodding her head she said, you the most handsome man in the whole wide world.  So am I more handsome than Dhoni, off course you are she said. I see, he asked am I even more handsome than John Abrahams?  Without a doubt she said, you are the most handsome of them all.  Taking her hands in his he slid his mouth against her ear then that means those two can live a bit longer. She gave a sweet chuckle, you Mr Kapoor are too much.  With his eye on her he said because you make me this way Mrs Kapoor, you make me this way.

 

 

She lowered her eyes spotting her overnight bag on the floor next to him, did you bring some of my things?  Yes he said. I want to have a bath please, my hair needs to be washed.  Well then that’s what we will do right now.  Are you going to help me she asked, off course baby I will.  Right then the nurse walked in, good morning sir, mam can I bring you your breakfast?  Priya shook her head no I want to have my bath first, ok mam I will help you.  Ram said, no need for that I will help my wife, but sir, he said with impatience please leave us alone I will take care of my wife.  The nurse shook her head and walked out of the room.  Priya said, can you imagine what she’s going to think and all the gossip that's going to take place amongst the nurses. Baby do you actually think I really care, no one dares take away my right from me.  Ram she was just doing her job, well that part of her job we don’t need now come on let’s get you into the bath, sit here for a minute while I go run the water and I will be back to take you in.

 

 

Once he’d got the bath tub filled to a medium temperature ,he went back out into the room and carried her into the bath, you know I can walk she said.  I know he said while he removed her hospital gown leaving her naked exposing the waterproof dressing on her chest and along her shoulder. With a grin on his face why take the pleasure away from me, he asked? She laughed has he helped her ease into the tepid water, ohhhhhh this is so nice she sighed.  Lying comfortably back against the rest she let the warm water ease over her body releasing the aches and tension in her muscles.  Her shoulder was a bit uncomfortable ouch she said. Take it easy baby please just relax and let me do the rest.  Using some of her shampoo he washed her hair then rinsed off the foam, he massaged conditioner into her clean wet hair allowing the texture  to soften while he went about lathering her body with her body wash careful not to touch her wound.  He rinsed her from head to toe letting the soapy water run through,  then he re-filled fresh clean water letting her soak some more in the tub while he helped her brush her teeth. After she was done she closed her eyes absorbing the clean feel, this feels so nice I feel so clean.

 

He smiled well my queen I’m glad you enjoying that, she opened her eyes looking into his thank you Ram, thank you so much.  Hey what are you thanking me for holding her chin he said, there’s no thank you between us, you are my life I will do anything for you. Silence passed between them clearing his throat he said the water is getting cold I think we need to get you back into bed and ready for your breakfast, she nodded her head, ok I’m ready.  Helping her out of the bath he toweled her down covering her body in a soft towel which he secured between her breasts, taking another clean towel he wrapped her wet hair absorbing the wetness out.

 

Letting her sit on the chair he went about getting her underwear and her satin silk pajamas which he helped her slip on.  She felt so much better having the feel of her own clothing on her skin while Ram began to blow dry her hair.  Is there something I can do for myself, she asked? With a grin he said off course you can, giving her a bottle of her favorite perfume he allowed her to dab this sweet floral scent on her skin while he continued to dry her long tresses of hair. How did she ever get to be so lucky to have him in her life, she asked this question a million times but it always still felt like a dream a million times over. Ram she called, yes baby, with a sheepish grin she said, you look really sexy in those jeans.  Mrs Kapoor are your flirting with me, she laughed well you do, I mean you do look really sexy and she blushed.  Bending down next to her he touched her face kissing her lips he eased her mouth open slipping his tongue into her mouth deepening the kiss.  She ran her hands through his hair while he tightened his grip on her, ouch she cried.  Oh god baby are you ok I’m so sorry, did I hurt you he asked worriedly.  No she said whenever I move my shoulder it hurts, i’m so sorry I should have been more careful. She smiled it’s ok, really it’s ok I’m fine, he stood up I think I need to get you back into bed, he went to lift her up into his arms and she stopped him. Ram please don’t carry me I want to walk a bit, please she begged. Ok he said but wait let me get your slippers for you he slipped them on her feet and eased her out of the chair. Hold onto my arm he said while he held her around her waist walking her slowly into her room.

 

Two nurses were busy changing the bedding with clean fresh sheets when they heard the bathroom door open looking up they smiled at them, Mrs Kapoor look at you Priya blushed they moved away  allowing the couple to walk to the bed. Well Mrs Kapoor I think it’s time for you to eat I will get your tray for you.  Ram said to the nurse don’t worry about it I’ve brought food for my wife.  The nurse nodded her head ok sir, before she left she said to them just to let you know the doctor will here in about an hour. Ram nodded his head acknowledging the information the nurse passed on. He took out his phone and made a call, we ready he said. The door opened and in walked one of his men carrying a food basket which he placed on the table, thank you Ram said, that will be all.

Priya looked at this amazing man her husband did you think of everything.  Off course I did nothing but the best for you my love, now come let’s see what’s in here for you to eat. Opening the basket he said Bansi Kaka gave me strict instructions to ensure that you ate every thing of what’s in here, he also said to tell you that he’s missing you very much and wants you home soon, she smiled with thoughts of her favorite member of their household staff, how sweet of him.  Lifting the lid from one of the containers he opened to find a thickened butternut soup drizzled with cream, the smell of it making Priya hungry I’m starving she said.  Taking a spoon he fed her,  that tastes delicious he dipped fresh homemade crusty bread into it and fed her more.  She stopped him no this is not fair she said, she broke off a piece of the bread, what are you doing? I’m feeding you. No he said, shuushhh Priya said i’m not eating anymore if you don’t eat with me.  Why are you so stubborn he asked,  pouting her lips she said don't you want to eat with your Priya?  Baby you know you are just to much, I know she grinned now open your mouth she ordered. He was left with no choice has she fed him her butternut soup dipped in fresh crusty bread this was his first meal in many days and she knew it.  It hurt her knowing he was doing so much for her but was neglecting himself so forgetting about herself she took over her wifely duties ensuring her man was fed. After they were done he cleared away the food tray and the basket was collected.

Kicking of her slippers she swung her legs up on the bed lying against the pillows. Ram please sit next to me that’s risky he said, why she asked?  Because you are a hellcat she laughed stop it she said just come here dusting the space next to her. He went willingly getting himself comfortable next to her while she rested her head against his shoulder.  He held her hand playing with her fingers I love you she said, no you don’t love me he said. what she said how can you say that?  He said because I know you don't love me.  Off course I love you, prove it he challenged her, what she asked taken aback. He grinned prove that you love me, how she asked?  Kiss me he said giving her his most endearing roguish grin. She shook her head you know you crazy, right? Yes I know he said, bending his head closer to her I'm crazy just for you, are you going to kiss me he asked.  With a seductive smile she inched closer almost touching his lips with her lips she asked, are you going to make it worth my while their lips met and he spoke against her lips tell me what you want? just then the door opened and they quickly moved apart Dr Mehta smiled brightly at the both of them this is indeed a wonderful sight to see, Priya blushed. Dr Mehta said to Priya its so good to see the color back into your face, you looking really good,just amazing Priya miracles do happen my girl,  they do what a turn around this is. Priya said thank you doctor, thanks so much.  

 

The doctor walked to her and said Priya I need to do a few quick checks on you to ensure all your vital signs are ok, while she was working around Priya the doctor glanced at Ram and you Mr Kapoor are looking really good too. Priya laughed well doctor I was just telling him the very same thing earlier.  Ram for the first time was embarrassed while both Priya and the doctor laughed at his uneasiness.  Well Priya my girl this is indeed good news your heart rate is back to normal, your breathing is fine, your pressure is stabilized so with lots of care and bed rest you should be home soon. Ram tightened his hold on Priya that’s amazing news doctor I can’t tell you how happy I am to hear that, the doctor smiled at him me too Mr Kapoor, me too.  Priya looked at the both of them unsure of herself she said, doctor if you think I’m doing better then can't I see my son, I need to see him please I need to see my Kush he must be so alone missing me, please doctor let me see my baby.

Those seconds were pained hours for Ram he couldn’t even breathe, the doctor gave him a compassionate look something passed between them in that look that made Priya take notice.  She stilled in her movement her breathing went shallow was that a look of pity or was it sadness, a panic washed over her waiting to erupt.  What’s going on she asked looking at a silent Ram who had his eyes lowered away from her, what’s going on she asked again.  Ram why are you quiet she asked, say something, say something please. Where’s my baby, I want my Kush.  Dr Mehta sat down on the chair taking hold of Priya’s hand she said Priya calm down please. calm down.  Ignoring the doctor Priya asked what’s going on, why aren’t you saying anything Ram she urged him I want my baby.  I’m his mother and I have the right to see my son you cannot do this to me for god sake let me see my baby. How can you sit there Ram and not say anything, how can you let them keep me away from our son.  Ram could not bear this torment any longer he couldn’t handle Priya being so worked up and on edge.  Stroking her arm and without anymore delay he said, sweetheart we lost our baby.

 Priya didn’t move what do you mean we lost our baby she asked, not daring to breathe?  Our baby died.  Our baby died, those three deathly words knotted inside Priya an emptiness washing over her.  Shutting the sounds of everything around her she closed her eyes squeezing them tight holding her stomach I want to sleep she said, I want to go to sleep.  Priya Ram said please hear me out, Ram please leave me I’m tired I want to sleep. He looked at the doctor in panic the doctor looked at him nodding her head giving him assurance,  ok Priya we are leaving she said you must be tired you go to sleep and we’ll talk later.  Ram eased his body away placing Priya’s head on the pillow she lay  slightly on her side refusing to open her eyes. It’s going to be ok baby I promise it’s going to be ok. Leave me she said I want to sleep, he kissed her forehead and said I love you.  Walking away from the bed, away from his wife leaving her like this was the most difficult thing for him, with every step he took his heart broke for Priya while every breath she took was in pain.

 

Tu mujhe chhod jaaye yeh nahi ho sakta saathiya
Your leaving me, my lover, is not possible
Meri baaton mein tera zikr sada
In my talks there's always a mention of You
Meri yaad mein teri fikra sada
In my memories, your worry is always there
Main jo bhi hoon tum hi to ho
I am what I am, it is because of You
Mujhe tum se mili apni adaa
From You only, I got my grace

 

 

Outside the room he turned to the doctor, I can’t leave her like this I know Ram I know how you feeling but right now that was a lot for her to absorb. She needs time to comprehend, but doctor she’s refusing to hear me out. Touching his arm it’s hard for her right now let her sleep this off and we’ll be there for her when she wakes up.  Ram felt uneasy no doctor I don’t feel right, I know Priya to well this is not normal behavior she tends to have a delayed reaction when she’s in shock and I feel like there’s a storm brewing in there.  Ram come with me to my office and lets chat a bit more, the nurses are right here and will monitor her reluctantly with a heavy heart Ram walked away with the doctor .

 

 

Kyun ki tum hi ho, ab tum hi ho
Because it's only You, now it's only You
Zindagi ab tum hi ho...
You're my life now
Chain bhi, mera dard bhi
You're my peace, my pain also
Meri aashiqui ab tum hi ho
You're my only love now

 

 

In the silent room Priya was lying on the bed her eyes closed she knew at which point Ram and the doctor left, she knew when the nurse entered her room but she refused to open her eyes pretending to  be asleep.  She could hear the sounds of the nurse flipping through her chart then hear the footsteps leave the room.  Letting the silence surround her, in her darkened mind she tried to concentrate on a bright rising sun letting the big ball of sunshine engulf her thoughts. In the background she could hear a little boy running, his tiny little feet moving like the speed of lightening while he was being playfully chased around. In the innocence of his laughter he called mama, mama he giggled some more she tried to grip his shirt but his tiny feet took him away from her, from his mama.  She closed her ears squeezing her eyes tight her toes curled digging into the sheet the laughter didn’t go away mama, mama the little boy squealed with delight.  

 

Tum hi ho, tum hi ho
It's only You
Arz bhi, mera marz bhi...
My talks, my decisions (choices)
Chain bhi, mera dard bhi
My peace, also my pain
Meri aashiqui ab tum hi ho
You're my only love now

 

 

 

She felt pain running in her body ripping her apart hitting at the soul of her. Waking up she got off the bed and walked to the window, seeing the outside she clasped her hands against her cheeks covering her eyes the bright day light hurting her eye.   Memories of Friday came flooding into her head his voice against her ear holding a gun to her head, his threat, I’m going to kill you bitch I’m going to kill you and your little brat you going to die bitch. She dropped her hands to her stomach holding it tight shaking her head no she said quivering, no she stepped back this can't be true the voice followed her, tormenting her your little rich brat is going to die, I’m going to kill you bitch.  The voice changed sweetheart  we lost our son, was that Ram’s voice was that his voice she questioned stepping back shaking her head, our baby died he said.  Her left leg faltered has she went back against the wall our baby died, he said.  With her two hands against her head she gripped into her scalp refusing to hear, her face screwed up in tightened pain.  She moved her head from side to side take care of my baby he said, with my life she said, I will take care of our baby with my life.  Shaking her head wanting the demons to leave her alone, sweetheart we lost our son, our baby died.  Slowly she slid down against the wall this can’t be true noooooooooooo this can’t be true.  She raised her knees wrapping her hands around  her like a wounded soul noooooooooooooooooooooooo she screamed again, I can’t  she choked on as she screamed nooooooooooo hitting herself why, why not me she cried, why not me choking on her deep wounded sobs. 

 

 

Just a few minutes earlier Neha was walking down the corridor towards Priya’s room, Vikram was busy on his phone she didn't wait for him so she carried on walking she was eager to see her friend.  she was almost there and In all of her life that voice will haunt her, the sound of shrieking pain hitting her ears the sound so heart wrenchingly familiar.  She ran, running with speed to get to Priya’s room while a nurse and two bodyguards rushed in before her only to find them looking at Priya crumbled on the floor helplessly.  She pushed her away forward kneeling down on the floor taking Priya into her arms, oh Priya she cried holding her. Priya tightened her arms around Neha’s neck crying uncontrollably.  It’s ok I’m here she said, I’m right here. My baby she hiccupped Neha my baby is dead she cried why didn't they just leave me to die. Why did I live it hurts so much Neha, its hurts so much. I know baby, I know Neha said soothing her hair I know how you must be hurting and I’m hurting so much for you.  Shaking her head in the crook of Neha’s neck with the flood gates opened, I want to die Neha I want to die she cried, Neha cried for her best friend, she cried has a mother, she cried has a woman holding Priya just holding her was all that she could do right now.

 

 

 

When the bodyguard rushed to get Ram and the doctor, Ram was beside himself coming into the scene seeing his wife hysterically fallen apart being consoled by Neha and to hear his wife say I want to die shattered him.  It shattered him completely that his Priya was talking this way. Through her own tears Neha saw Ram standing there, sniffling her nose she said to Priya you mean the world to all of us, how would we live without you.  I don’t care she cried, I don’t care I just want my baby this is all my fault, it’s my fault that my baby died.  No Priya don’t say that it’s not your fault, yes she screamed it’s my fault I was responsible for this my baby died because of me.  It’s not your fault Priya its never your fault baby, come on don’t speak like this.  Tightening her hold on Neha’s neck Ram will never forgive me, how will I face him I killed our son.   Neha looked at Ram helplessly Ram went forward bending on the floor he took Priya in his arms, she stiffened.  I killed our baby she cried, I killed our baby, you must hate me so much I am a murderer I killed our son.  Baby please don’t say this you didn’t kill our baby please he broke down she cried holding onto him, it’s my fault, it’s all my fault. He held her not letting her go has they cried for their loss in each others arms.

 

 Dr Mehta and Neha knew all that Ram and Priya needed right now was each other so they stepped out of the room leaving the couple alone to deal with their trauma.  How can you say it’s not my fault when I broke my promise to you.  Ram through his own tears looked confused what promise did you break. I promised you that I would take care of our baby with my life but here I am alive and our baby is dead, I didn't protect our baby.  Ram couldn’t bear this pain lifting her up in his arms he carried her to the bed sitting down himself he let her lie on him careful not to hurt her.  Sweetheart didn’t I tell you your life is mine, its mine to keep do you think for one second that I could live without you, Priya I’d die without you, you my life he said I love you more than I love myself.  Yes we lost our baby but we still have each other and when the time is right we can have babies again.  Kush will always be special in our lives and where ever he is he will be watching over us.  He’ll be our son always but right now baby I need you more than anything else in this world, please my angel don’t do this to yourself. 

  

 

Tere liye hi jiya main
I lived for You only
Khud ko jo yun de diya hai
I've given myself away in this way
Teri wafaa ne mujhko sambhaala
Your faithfulness cared for me
Saare ghamo ko dil se nikaala
It took away all the sadnesses from the heart

Main jo mit bhi gaya to wajood mera
Even if I get eradicated, still my existence
Sada tujh mein rahe zinda... hmm...
Shall remain alive inside You forever

  

 

She hiccupped against his chest, the tears a nonstop stream, how can you say this? because I love you, and we love each other and together we will get through this. We just need each other baby, just each other I promise you I will never fail you again.  She went quiet and said, you didn’t fail me but I failed you.  Sweetheart if I didn’t leave you to go in by yourself that day none of this would have happened. I should have ensured that you had security with you. No I insisted remember I insisted that I don’t need protection.   Baby please stop blaming yourself yes we lost our baby maybe it wasn’t the right timing for us but I’m sure the day will come when we can be parents one day and if we not then that’s ok too because you are my world just you and no one else.  Ram I feel so empty, so empty inside she whispered everything hurts inside. Wiping her tears he hugged her no more tears I love you and only you that’s all that matters. To lightened the moment he said anyway you are my baby always and I’ll be your baby always he chuckled in between the tears. Why do you always end up saying the right things, because I love you he said with finality!

 

 

Kyun ki tum hi ho, ab tum hi ho
Because it's only You, now it's only You
Zindagi ab tum hi ho...
You're my life now
Chain bhi, mera dard bhi
You're my peace, my pain also
Meri aashiqui ab tum hi ho
You're my only love now

 

 

 Minutes passed by her head lying against his heart, the beat pulsing against her ear she didn’t have the energy to speak she just closed her eyes to absorb everything that happened. Being here lying against her Ram being comforted by him felt so right, she didn’t want to know anything else all that mattered he loved her and only her.  He stroked her hair gently no words spoken just this moment between them, this moment of comfort that was all they needed.   

 

Tum hi ho, tum hi ho
It's only You
Zindagi ab tum hi ho...
You're my life now
Chain bhi, mera dard bhi
My peace, also my pain
Meri aashiqui ab tum hi ho
You're my only love now

 

 

 

Later much later she said Ram, hmmmm yes baby I want to see our son, I want to see him before we say goodbye to him forever.  Ram’s hand stilled unsure what to say, please take me to him I’m ready to see him.  Ram felt like his world was going to collapse right there and then with baited breath he said he’s no more sweetheart, our boy is no more I cremated him yesterday morning, I gave our son his final rights. All Priya could hear was his rapid heartbeat against her ear with every thud of that beat rage built within her, her fingers curled into his shirt her nails digging down pressing into his chest.  he was too numb to even feel pain he just held her tightly, picking up her head she pushed herself slightly away her shoulder aching but she ignored it, looking into his tear stained eyes her eyes sparkled with anger clasping her hands tightly to her side pulling a strain on her shoulder, what did you say she asked him again?  He spoke softly almost to a whisper I cremated our son yesterday. 

 

 Seconds ticked by maybe minutes passed Ram didn’t know what to say or what to do he looked straight into the eyes of a woman possessed. With all of her might forgetting her wound she lifted her hand sending it flying across the side of his face all he could feel was the burning sting cracking against his cheek the electric sound of a whip lash sting, his wife just slapped him.  How dare you she yelled at him, how dare you take my right away from me.  Grabbing hold of his shirt who gave you that right she screamed at him who gave you that right she yelled at him a broken mother, I’m his mother she cried her voice was hoarse that was my baby you took away from me. Ram was too shocked and stunned to even re-act all he knew all he could see was her fists and feel her slaps, her hair wild and flying around hitting his chest till she was too drained and tired. 

 

 

She fell on his chest landing like a broken doll, I hate you Ram I hate you so much. She mumbled against his chest I hate you, I hateee youuu her speech slurred I hateeeeeeeeeeeee youuuuuu.  She drifted off to sleep lying on his chest strands of her hair plastered to her face wet from her fresh tears while he just held on for life, a shattered broken man of a billion dollars.

 

 

Hum tere bin ab reh nahin sakte
Tere bina kyaa vajood meraa
I can't live without you now,
What's my existence without you..

Tujh se judaa gar ho jaayenge
To khud se hi ho jaayenge judaa
If I get separated from you,
I'll be separated from my own self..

Kyonki tum hi ho
Ab tum hi ho
Zindagi, ab tum hi ho
Chain bhi, meraa dard bhi
Meri aashiqui ab tum hi ho
Because you alone are,
Now you only are,
life. You're my life.
My peace, and my pain,
you alone are my love..